


Kisses and Tea

by Rachel_Lu



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (1963), Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: ElevenxRose - Freeform, F/M, Return, Reunions, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-05
Updated: 2015-09-05
Packaged: 2018-04-19 02:38:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4729598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rachel_Lu/pseuds/Rachel_Lu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eleven thinks about Kazran's words nearing the end of "A Christmas Carol"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kisses and Tea

**Author's Note:**

> I've never written 11xRose and I'm likely never to again, but the quote that starts the fic off very much got me thinking, and I hope you all enjoy it!

He'd promised himself that he wouldn't do this to her, not again.  And he hadn't, until he regenerated.  That was a face she wouldn't recognize, that wouldn't demolish her timeline and possibly take away the piece of him that she now had in that parallel world.

_"Think about it, Doctor.  One last day with your beloved.  Which day would you choose?"_

Kazran had been right, of course.  And there was no denying who had come into the Doctor's mind when the words had been spoken.  One last day.  That's all he needed. Even if it was a horrible idea and he probably shouldn't do it at all, at any cost.

But for all selfish reasons, he needed to see her again, to pretend, just for a few moments, that everything was alright, that she was still his Rose and belonged to him.  She did, didn't she?  She still loved him, the Time Lord him, she had to. 

He didn't want to tell Amy and Rory where they were going, what they were doing, because so far it had been all smiles and laughter, mostly.  And, it had been all smiles and laughter for this regeneration.  Mostly.  He had a feeling that if he laid eyes on her, it would very much be over.  He'd sink into the depressed man he had been before she had made him better.  She was the first and last face he had seen in his last incarnation, and he wanted to look upon her again, if even for a moment.

"Powell Estate?" Amy wrinkled her nose when she saw it, crossing her arms over her chest.  Rory surveyed the area quietly, not seeming to have garnered an opinion just yet.

"What, you've been?" The Doctor asked nonchalantly, glancing about as if nothing were amiss. 

"No, it's just not somewhere I'd usually..." Amy shrugged, and the Doctor could tell she was choosing her next words carefully, "Interact."

"Very nice save on your part, Amy Pond, I'm rather proud of that."  He waved a finger at her, "Not the point though.  I'm here on a mission you might not want to see, so if not, there's a chippy round the corner."  He waved his hands dismissively at the last bit, trying not to remember how often he'd been at that particular chippy with a very particular person.

"How do you know that?" Amy furrowed her brows.  "What are you doing here?  Is it something you don't want us to see?" She didn't sound offended, only concerned, with a touch of upset in her voice which he couldn't say he blamed her for, really. 

Rory glanced up passively at them.  "If it's all the same to you, Doctor, I think it's your own business where you take us," he said kindly.

The Doctor offered him a cheery smile.  "Thank you, Rory. And, I know almost everything," he said dismissively.  "Here to visit a friend, that's all."

"A friend?" Amy's face split into a wide grin.  "Ooh, Doctor, you're here to visit an old girlfriend, aren't you?  You had a girlfriend from the Powell Estates, how... Scandalous."

The Doctor sniffed.  "She was hardly my girlfriend and she was hardly scandalous.  And I mean that, Amy, she was wearing a lot of... Clothes, most of the time, unless there were skirts involved."

"Bet you hated that.  The 'lot of clothes' part."

"Amy Pond!"

She giggled and swatted his arm.  "Oh, please, take a joke.  You're blushing quite a bit right now.  Look, if you want to be left alone, I can do that for you just fine, but you come get us if you start crying, understood?"

The Doctor smiled weakly.  "Alright."

They left him, then, and Rory clapped him on the shoulder as he passed, throwing him an understanding look.  Of course.  Maybe he should've talked to Rory about all this sooner, have a man-to-man chat about... Women, and the like.

No, best that they didn't do anything like that.  Ever.

He watched them walk away, in the back of his mind trying to reassure himself that they were really leaving and not going to hide behind something to spy on him.  He checked his watch, and confirmed the date.  January 27th, 2005.  She'd meet the Ninth him in March.  This was good.  They would be fine.  He knew he was just trying to convince himself that this wasn't the worst idea he'd had since he regenerated.

He still knew exactly which flat was hers.  He knew the cat flat was actually nailed down this time, before he would come and wreck it.  He knew Rose was inside.  With any luck, and he meant any luck, Jackie wouldn't be home.  Before he could lose his nerve, he rapped lightly on the door, trying not to sound threatening.

It was then that he froze.  He hadn't planned what he'd say when he saw her, how he'd explain himself and what the hell he was doing on her front stoop.  And there really was no pure explanation for it, was there?  Anything he could think of would go terribly, horribly south the moment it left his mouth.  He tried to backtrack, bring up any information the TARDIS had from this day about Rose from the little 'girl talk' chats he knew they used to have in the library.  Those chats usually consisted of Rose chattering and painting her nails as the TARDIS let out encouraging hums. 

He panicked.  The TARDIS had to know something, for the love of _everything_ , she had to.

His anxious inner ramblings were cut off by Rose Tyler opening the front door.  She looked startled, to say the least, but she smiled at him.  "You sellin' something?" She asked, putting her weight on one hip.

Oh.  He'd _missed_ that.  Her accent seemed thicker now, and he remembered exactly how much both this and the last incarnation of himself sounded like her, because she was in his head when he'd regenerated. 

At that moment, the TARDIS decided to send him some very, very useful information about what Rose Tyler had been up to the night before this.  He smiled widely at her.  "Hello.  I'm John."  He nearly winced.  She knew that one.  He'd have to come up with a new last name.

"Hello, John," she replied.  "If you're here to see the lady of the house, my mum's not in."

The Doctor breathed out a little sigh of relief.  "Oh, I'm not here to see your mum, I've come to see you."

Rose quirked an eyebrow.  "Are you?  I'm sorry, if we've met, I don't remember you.  What's your full name?"

"John White," he lied easily.  "And yours?"

"You said you were here to see me," she pointed out, leaning against the door frame.  "But there's something oddly familiar about you...  My name's Rose.  Rose Tyler."  She stuck her hand out for him and he, almost too quickly, took her hand to shake.  He almost sobbed with relief at the contact that was so casual to her but so important to him. 

"Pleasure to meet you, Rose Tyler,"

She smiled at him again.  "And you, John White.  So, do you want to tell me why you came to see me?  And how you found my address for that matter?"

The Doctor shuffled his feet.  "I-I saw you, last night, in that nightclub, and I wanted to say hello, but..." He gestured at himself, "As you can see, I'm not what they call 'cool'."

"You might be," she said, tapping her lips with your finger. "About my address, now?"

"Yes, your address.  Your friend told me, when I asked her about you," he said, sending the TARDIS a message to please plant the correct story in Shireen's head.  She sent him a sound wave of approval, telling him she was getting right on it.

"Shireen," Rose rolled her eyes.  "That was probably who you spoke with."  She paused, suddenly looking a little shy.  "You really wanted to talk to me that much?"

The Doctor nodded emphatically.  "Yes.  You're rather beautiful, if no one's ever told you that."

"Considering I'm from the Estates," she replied smoothly.

His hearts stuttered in his chest at the words.  "Considering nothing," he said firmly.  "You're beautiful, it's really rather simple."

She bit her lip to keep from smiling too widely and shifted, as though she were thinking something over.  "Do you want to come in for tea?"

"Yes."

they walked inside and Rose started yammering on about the nightclub last night and she asked him what he thought of the new place.  It was new, after all, she said, new bars, new dance floor, the whole ten yards.

"It was very lovely," the Doctor agreed.  "Never been there before." 

"So it must've been pleasant for you," she remarked as she prepared the kettle to put on the stove. 

"Yeah," he agreed.  "Rose, may I be very blunt with you?"

"That is what people do when they like someone at a club, John.  They're very blunt.  So go ahead."  She tossed a reassuring smile at him over her shoulder.

"I'd really like to kiss you," he said bashfully.  So bashful, in fact, that Rose found she wanted to do it.  But, not that easily.

"Tell me why," she said softly, turning to face him.

He gulped, forcing himself to focus on her eyes.  "Alright, well.  I think you're rather beautiful, as I said.  And, I saw you dancing, Rose, you're so alive.  Everything about you is golden, and I just found myself wanting to get to know you and... I can't."  He nearly swallowed the last two words, choking on a sob.

"Why not?" She asked worriedly. 

"Because I'm dying, Rose," he said quietly.  "I've got this cancer," he continued, and he could tell that Rose believed him. Why, he didn't know, but she did. He saw it in the compassion in her eyes.  He cleared his throat and continued.  "And you know, that club was my last hurrah, so to speak.  I was hoping I wouldn't see anyone like you, someone to grow attached to.  I never wanted that, but I saw you and there was something about you."

She paused, seeming to be considering as she studied his face.  "If it were any other man, I'd say you were lying," she cupped his cheek with her hand.  "I don't know why, but I believe you."

He couldn't stop himself.  His hands crept up to hold onto her waist.  "Rose," he felt tears build up behind his eyes.  "May I kiss you?  I'm not asking for anything else, that's all I want."

"Tea and kisses?" She asked softly, her other hand creeping up to his other cheek.  She smiled a little, her thumbs brushing away the tears that managed to slip down his face. 

He nodded slowly but purposefully, watching her.  "Yes." he whispered.  "Tea and kisses."

"I think that can be arranged," she smiled, and slowly pulled him down to her.

The sound he made when their lips met was most certainly not a whimper.  It wasn't, because Time Lords really didn't whimper, ever.  He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close, remembering every piece of her.  She was responding more enthusiastic than he thought, her fingers pushing through his hair and hands pulling him ever closer.

She pulled away, panting for breath, and ran a hand through his hair again.  "Kisses and tea," she agreed, "Yeah, we can do kisses and tea."

He leaned in to kiss her again, chaste this time.  "Good."

They had tea, and it took longer than it should've to have tea, since they stopped to kiss every so often.  'Every so often' happened to be 'every couple minutes'.  They talked about everything, and the Doctor toned down his stories, telling Rose how he started travelling when he'd gotten sick, before he was too weak to do it anymore.  And in a way, before he'd met her, that was true.  Almost painfully so, in fact.  She listened raptly, eventually telling him how she wanted to travel, herself, but didn't have the money or the time. 

"Someday, Rose Tyler, you'll go travelling.  I'm sure of it," he said with conviction, making her smile. 

"I hope you're right, John," she said, and she looked so lovely that he had to lean in and kiss her again. 

He stayed until nightfall, and he told Rose (Very regretfully) that he needed to be going.  He knew if he didn't leave then, he never would.  She pulled him in for a long, deep kiss and whispered a goodbye against his lips.

"I won't see you again, will I?" She asked, wrapping her arms around his waist and hugging him tight.  He returned her embrace, holding her tightly.  He buried his face in her neck, having to bend over to do it, but not minding in the slightest. 

"No, you won't," he replied.  "My time's almost up," he hated lying to her, but it was the only way.  He cupped her face in his hands.  "Thank you for the kisses and the tea."

"I'll think of it always," she said quietly.  "Take a photo with me?  I want to remember this, think you might too."

He grinned.  "I'd love to."

She had a polaroid camera, an old thing, a lovely thing, and she took two photos, one for him and one for her.  She blew on his as it developed and once she was satisfied, handed it to him.  "For you," she said, smiling as she gave it to him.

He gazed at it for a moment and tucked it into his breast pocket.  "Next to my heart," he said smartly, smiling down at her.

She wasn't sure why she liked him so much.  But she did, and she was so upset by the knowledge that he was dying that somehow, she needed that photo, needed a little reminder of him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him again, and he felt her tears on his shirt collar.

"Don't cry," he whispered.  "You've made today so special for me."

She pulled back, wiping the tears from her eyes with one hand.  "I'm glad," she said firmly. 

"One more kiss for luck," he said cheekily, and leaned halfway, knowing she had to be the one to make the final decision.

And she did.  She pulled him down and kissed him, long and slow, savoring every piece of her for when he could never visit her again.  It was several minutes before they pulled away from each other and tipped their foreheads together.  "Goodbye, Rose Tyler."

"Goodbye," she whispered in return.  "I wish you could come back."

"As do I."

She pulled away from him and put her hand in his.  He nearly sobbed at the familiar contact of her hand in his.  "I'll walk you out," she said.

"Alright, then."

She walked him to the end of the Estate before kissing him again and they said formal goodbyes.  He didn't look away from her until she was back inside.  As he walked towards the TARDIS, he was reminded of a picture Rose had on her dresser in the TARDIS.  It couldn't be.

He rushed into the TARIDS and straight past Amy and Rory (who were very confused) and to where he was keeping Rose's room.  He flung the door open and stared at the picture.  Yes.  It was the picture of them.  And she'd kept it.  And put it up.  He smiled softly at it. 

"Oh, Rose.  How I still love you."

_"One last day with your beloved.  Which day would you choose?"_

 


End file.
